Timorese scholastic Ezequiel Ribeiro reflects on his regency in Timor Leste, as he embarks on theology, the next stage of his Jesuit formation.
I cannot imagine my two years of regency went so fast. I still remember vividly how full of confusion I was when I first arrived in Timor Leste. Many questions came into my mind, basically about the work I would carry out for the next two years.
Questions like what, how, why, who kept coming to my mind and I even doubted my own potential. I realised that the more we are bombarded with knowledge, the more we feel we are nothing and there is more that we need to learn. I might be wrong but that is what I feel.
After spending two weeks with my family, I was sent to Suai. It is in the south and is more than 100 km from Dili. It takes about 10 hours to get there by bus.
Suai is one of our mission areas, mainly involved in agriculture and education. It is a small community composed of one priest, one brother and one scholastic, and I was the youngest of all.
My basic assignment was as treasurer, assistant minister and teacher to our high school dormers. My first year of regency went so badly. I was lost and frustrated. The work seemed monotonous to me. Most of the time I spent at home and it was only twice a week I taught at the dorm. Besides the boring work, community life was also very challenging. My only consolation was meeting with other scholastics once a month in Dili.
In my second year of regency, I was introduced to one of the high schools in Suai, run by local parish. For me, it was the beginning of my real adventure as a regent. It was there that I found myself falling in love with teaching. I taught second and third year students. In addition, I also taught at the dorm twice a week. This dorm is for high school boys. They are poor students and most of them do not have relatives in town.
I had doubted my own potential, however this doubt started to melt as I began my second year of regency. I discovered a drive within that challenged me to go beyond my fear. This bravery helped to unveil my potential. The more I taught my students, the more I uncovered my own talents.
All the good imaginations I had during my formation started to come back as I moved along the journey. I was even surprised at the work I did. It never came to my mind that I had gone as far as this, especially when I conducted an English final presentation for my students at the end of the semester. The students presented some skits, poems and songs and the entire programme was in English. They invited their parents, local government and education authorities to watch their presentation and it went so well.
This presentation was meant to help the students discover their own potential. My hope was that at end of the course, they would be able to stand up and say “yes I can.” I believe the students managed it.
What motivated me most in my work was Matthew 10:8 which says “…freely you have received; freely give.” I realised that I have received so much during the years of formation and it is the time now to share freely with others especially the less fortunate ones. One time the treasurer of the school approached me and said “Bro, we can only pay you $100.” I told her that I was looking for experience not money.
I also loved traveling in the countryside. On Sundays I was sometimes assigned by the parish priest to communion service at a remote chapel. It is a wonderful experience to travel with Blessed Sacrament to a distant chapel by motorbike. It was a journey, like being one with Him in mission. I felt I was no longer alone but working closely with Him in His vineyard.
I really enjoyed my regency. The two years of regency were filled with enriching and meaningful experiences. It is an unforgettable memory in my life as a Jesuit. I really thank God for giving me such experiences.
The journey continues. The quest for the Infinite goes on. However there is a light that always illuminates the way – that is hope. The words “He calls me, He knows how to take care of me’ are my mantra. They are words of encouragement. They enlighten me as I move on with my new life in the formation of becoming a Jesuit priest. I have done my part; I just leave the rest to Him.